What? You too?

“It’s important that we share our experiences with other people. Your story will heal you, and your story will heal somebody else. When you tell your story you free yourself, and you give other people permission to acknowledge their story as well.” – Iyanla Vanzant

We need to be able to talk about what happened. We need to have our story witnessed and held by someone who empathises with our shock and pain.

Who gets just awful and life-changing it has been.

But we also feel supported, encouraged and helped by hearing someone else share their story with us. The story of their trauma, and how they have survived.

But why does that make such a difference to us?

It matters because trauma is so isolating. It can feel too big – too awful – to talk about and share.

We feel contaminated, and overwhelmed with shame. So, we keep it to ourselves – and we daren’t breathe a word.

And that is isolating; it makes things so much worse.

But when someone has the courage to open up and share, we feel more understood, and we feel we’re not alone. We feel that there is someone who knows what we’ve been through.

We see that they’ve survived – so perhaps we can do, too.

14 thoughts on “What? You too?

  1. So true. That is why the Bible tells us to confess our faults one to another that we may be healed. When we share our past hurts we encourage and help to heal each other. Thanks for the reminder.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. It’s so important to know we’re not alone. I was heartbroken to hear a man tell his story about when he finally got up the courage to tell another man about his struggle with porn. He asked, “Have you ever struggled with that?” and the other man just said, “No.” It was years before he was able to bring it up again with anyone. I’m thinking the man he confided in could have said, “No, but I have struggled with ____” (We’ve all struggled with some kind of sin.) And they could have helped each other, or at least prayed for each other.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m so sorry to hear about this man. I can imagine how he withdrew into himself and vowed he wold never risk sharing something as personal (and shameful in his mind) as this again. It’s very sad.
      And as you indicate here, we all struggle with different things, and we have all suffered in different ways. That is the common bond we share. Part of the human experience. If only we could recognize it …. Thanks for sharing these very important truths, Annie 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

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