The following is based on actual events …
For 25 years Karen absolutely knew that she was the centre of her parents’ world. How wonderful it was to be loved like that.
And they’d always been her rock … when the mean girls had been mean … when she’d lost her confidence, and had zero self-esteem.
And they’d raised a glass with her when her hopes and dreams came true, and she won a scholarship to the university.
But a strange thing had occurred at that time in Karen’s life. She couldn’t get a loan or a credit card at all. Further digging then revealed her credit rating had been trashed – which didn’t quite make sense since she’d never been in debt.
Fast forward several years to a hospice in her town, when Karen said goodbye – way too early – to her mom. She felt her heart would break at this devastating loss, and wondered how on earth she was going to survive.
But in time she found the strength to go back and help her Dad to sift through all the stuff that was left in her mom’s room. There were clothes and jewelry; there were books and photographs; and also a locked safe with surprising documents …
These documents revealed a stolen, false identity which Karen’s mom had used to amass extensive debts.
And the debts were linked to Karen. It was absolutely true. Yes, her mom had used her name – and had hidden everything.
No, it must be a mistake. She would never have done that. And, yet, here was the proof. It was clear for all to see.
But what did all this mean? Was her childhood one big lie? She felt sick and confused. Who on earth had her mom been?
I think that many partners experience the same thing when they first learn the truth of their partner’s secret life. They can’t believe their ears. It is shocking beyond words. They never thought their spouse would have hurt them in this way.
And what about the past? Was it all fantasy? Was any of it real? Has their whole life been a lie?
Perhaps we’ll never know. For we can’t tell what is true.
There are no grounds for trust when you’ve been deceived like this.