Finding Hope when you don’t Feel Hopeful

Sometimes you feel that you can’t face the battle. Sometimes you don’t feel courageous at all. Sometimes it all feels too much. Too overwhelming. Sometimes you feel that you just can’t go on.     

On days like this, when you’re fighting all the darkness, is there something you can do? Are there steps that you can take? It can often be helpful if you have ideas at hand – for you won’t have the energy to think at those bleak times. So here are some thoughts; a few things that you could try:

1. Acknowledge how you feel. Don’t try to sugar-coat it. You need to be authentic; you deserve to be authentic. Also, you can’t keep pretending, or keep faking how you feel. Eventually you’ll crack, and the feelings will seep through.

2. Work on developing a self-care routine. It will give you something to look forward to, and there’s a chance it will help to raise your self-esteem.

3. Try to notice any patterns in your thinking. Do you always tend to see things in the same old way? Are you stuck in a groove? Are you going round circles? Do you have expectations that cannot be realized? Is there one small ray of hope? Is there something you could change?

4. Remind yourself that you still have control over certain aspects of your daily life. Do you choose your meals and clothes? What you download on your phone? What you do in the evenings? Who you see in your free time? Do you still have some freedom and autonomy?

5. Lean into friendships where you feel fully accepted, where you’re free to be yourself, and you feel that you are safe.  If you can spend time with these people – or check in with them at times – you will probably feel stronger and more able to hold on.

“Hope is not pretending that troubles don’t exist. It is the hope that they won’t last forever. That hurts will be healed and difficulties overcome. That we will be led out of darkness and into the sunshine.”