If only I could love and like myself …
But for so many people, this can feel impossible. It’s an uphill battle, and a constant, daily struggle to really love themselves, and to feel that they’re worthwhile. If this describes your life, I hope the following will help you:
1. Instead of thinking about everything that’s wrong with you, try to get into the habit of thinking about aspects of yourself you are happy with – and, perhaps, are even proud of. It can be something as simple as taking pleasure from a beautiful garden you have created; or a delicious meal you have cooked; or the fact that you are good at languages; or that people find you easy to be around.
2. Remind yourself that no-one is perfect. Everyone has flaws. For example, actresses and models often look good because people have spent hours on their appearance, deliberately creating a specific image, or shooting pictures of them from a particular angle, or in a certain light.
Bear in mind, too, that people who are accomplished in one area may perform well below average in another area. It’s rare to find someone who is good at everything.
3. Be kind to yourself when you survey your past. We all make some mistakes. Everyone – not only. Also, not everyone has had the same advantages in life. And some of us have had some very bad experiences. That has had an influence on our life’s trajectory.
4. Work on liking most of yourself. Perhaps you could just like one tiny portion of yourself. That could be a good starting place for now. The fact is, almost everyone can find something they’d like to change about themselves. Something they don’t like … or feel ashamed of … or embarrassed about. Maybe bear that in mind when you are looking at yourself through negative, demanding, and critical eyes.
5. At the end of the day, we are more that the sum of our parts. Taken together, all the parts of who we are create an individual who is totally unique. No-one has ever been like you. And no-one will ever be like you. Because you are you, you add value to the world in a way that only you, and no-one else can ever do. That makes you valuable and irreplaceable.
“Quieten that voice of doubt inside of you. You are good enough. You are smart enough. You are worthy of love. You deserve good things. You are beautiful because you are you.”